~ Reflections ~

As children, we epitomize our parents... but at the back of our head we also sort out their habits subconsciously into the ones you wish you'd get, and those you wouldn't want to inculcate. Imagine my surprise when, in a recent discussion with my parents, I realized that I had subconsciously started doing some of the things in exactly the way they do... except, as a kid, I didn't like it... What would you call it then... growing up ? inheritance ?  Or has my memory just dulled and I have chosen the path of convenience over the right one... All of us change with time.. but am wondering if I'll suddenly realize one fine day, that I've turned into a person I don't like ! 

I like travelling... different places... different people... different food :) Actually I revel in it... By places, I don't necessarily mean globetrotting... even different streets of Delhi qualifies... because each nook and corner seems to have a species of homo sapiens specific to that latitude and longitude, with a food specialty too... Chatting up with people is the perfect way to understand their ecosystem, and how they tick... My latest sample space of human curios are Ola/Uber drivers, who seem to belong to varied sects/segments of society, from college students to part time workers to fleet operators.... each of them has a different story to tell... and different side of the coin....

In the last few years, especially the last five years, Media, especially in India, seems to have turned a new leaf. With the availability of 24 X 7 news channels to feed, and 24 pages to print, there is a growing strain on content.  Terms like newsworthy and breaking news have been totally redefined, items and issues are openly plugged, without any scruples. When Gail Wynand openly accepted that he plugged an event or an issue, he was clear it was about circulation and making money. Now, all media personnel seem to have turned into the same Gail, atleast on paper. The other issue, which has become a bigger problem nowadays is the lack of unbiased narrative reporting, as the events panned out. What was earlier restricted to the center-spread of the newspapers (and to add, well modulated by the editors) has now become what is common content. Everyone has an opinion (which they did earlier as well), and are happy to express it on first page and prime-time, where one would have

We fret over tiny things... we cry over minute issues... And then we face the big one... to realize it was all for nothing.... that all this strife was all for a peaceful life and a dignified death... whatever we might do, we Will end up... in that small piece of land.. 

What is Vertigo ? Fear of Falling ? Then why do we feel it even when the observation tower comes equipped with a sturdy handrail ?  No, vertigo is something other than the fear of falling. It is the voice of the emptiness below us which tempts and lures us, it is the desire to fall, against which, terrified, we defend ourselves. These lines from The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera  ring true to me... There is a thin line between the fear of doing something, and the fear because you realize you have the urge... despite knowing that the end result might not be very good. This is not an argument of the devil and the angel sitting on your shoulders... this is pure impulse... and the fear of the impulse... because suddenly, you face the moment of truth.

Frustration is a frustrating feeling... It sucks you unto a loop of negativity leading to even more negative thoughts.. further leading to an increased dose of frustration.... It is like a maze which you can't exit by finding light at the end of the tunnel... there is no end of the tunnel...  one just has to break a hole through the damn tunnel, and try and feel better about themselves...

We learn different aspects to different people/moments we come across in life... afterall we are but sponges, who absorb what we come across, both positive and negative... The love for history from a fabulous teacher in school who kept narrating history of the world like small anecdotes she witnessed herself.... The love for reading from a doting grandfather who would mark out snippets in the newspaper for us to read... The fear of traffic defaulters from the accident of a dear friend... The list is endless.... But we somehow ignore the inherent reason we are able to soak all this up... the gene pool and the environment we grew up in, thanks to our family and near and dear....

Ok... So the Delhi air still looks quite smoky and polluted. But the one thing no one who has travelled the Delhi roads in the last week will deny... is that irrespective of what impact this odd-even formula has had on the pollution levels, it has definitely made driving on Delhi roads a pleasure again. So for all the critics, presenting to you, the clean.. oops, empty Delhi roads.. Kudos to all the people travelling on the Delhi roads these days... for putting up with the buses, metros, autos, cabs.. whatever it takes.. to make it work !