~ Reflections ~

Being a woman is tough.... and I don't mean it in a rudimentary way of a menstural cycle and pregnancy and post partem. I mean the more obvious way of having to deal with a roving eye. I have been raised to be an independent, and (almost!) self sufficient person who can take care of herself come hell or high water ! In all these years in the corporate world an trying to make the workplace a more inclusive place, there is a sixth sense which kicks in when I interact with some people.... and THAT is the one thing that keeps me on my toes ! Am I over-reacting in thinking like this... afterall 21% percent of the workforce comprises of women. We might not be a majority, but it isn't a negligible statistic.  Then what is it that makes the mind cringe on those odd occasions ?  Staying away is not the solution, neither is being overly cautious about it.  What is the solution ? Besides relying on the sixth sense, which suddenly just steps up in sticky situation :)

All of us talk about gender equality, and woman empowerment... How a girl is as good as a boy, that she can be treated like one... I've heard lots of parents saying they've raised their daughters like sons... maybe with the intent that they have been raised to be as independent and self sufficient...  But as long as we aspire for our girls to be treated like the boys... as long as the women are competing with the men... we can never be expected to be treated as equals... it feels like there is still something lacking... Women who seek to equal men lack ambition ~ Marilyn Monroe

Recently watched Pink . I could go on and on about how everyone must must watch this movie, especially the current generation. Not to understand what are the do's and don'ts for nightlife for a women in Delhi. But to understand what is perceived, not just by strangers but even our peers. It left one with a numbing feeling that anyone could be trapped in the same way. And ironically one doesn't need to be naive either. Even a all knowing street smart person can get caught.  So what is the solution. Not just to avoid such "accidents" but also how to break the prejudices in peoples minds.  Education, clearly, isn't the answer, since I myself know well educated and groom post graduates suffering the same prejudices. The crux however remains, that each and every human being (not just males but females as well) needs to listen to and understand the meaning of these lines. "ना " सिर्फ़ एक  शब्द  नहीं अपने आप में  एक पूरा वाक्य हैं  ...

All of us talk about India being a progressive society. That we are catching up the "modern" world.  That women are now treated equally... or atleast will be. It is a good thought to pursue, since India is one of the few nations in the world where we have the existence of a matriarchal society, where the woman of the house has the right to property, money and business. Don't get me wrong, it is not about the money, but more a sense of power and rights, and the notional symbols attached to it by our society. Needless to say, in most cases, the woman is forced to fight for this right, despite being the care giver towards the later parts of life. And again, by woman, I don't necessarily mean daughter... it could well be the daughter-in-law who has been doing what it takes. But what good is all this power, when the same woman is beaten, raped in wide open streets, and then is told that she is at "fault" and is tainted... ironically due a crime committe...

I recently read this article by Gloria Steinem called If Men Could Menstruate. Though I don't entirely agree with all that she says, the nerve she has touched upon is very relevant. We (and it is true for both the East & the West) belong to a male dominated society, where most terms and things, from "mankind" to "manliness" get their term from the male counterpart. Language, unknowingly has a tendency of creating a bias in our minds. Even more ironic is the way the Modi supporters have lashed out at Kavita Krishnan for her showing why she disagrees with the #Selfiewithdaughter movement. Though I don't agree entirely with what she says (yes, again !!), the essence of what she says is spot on...  There are innumerable people, from Sunitha Krishnan  to Malala Yousafzai , who have nearly lost their lives on multiple occasions, fighting for women rights.... but the root cause of the problem is closer home than we realize...  The treatment is ...

Was recently reading an Article on how tears know no gender... however society has always tried to associate tears as a sign of weakness....  I remember mentioning this in an earlier post , and somehow, the thought evokes the exact same emotions...  I am all for privacy of emotions and especially tears. But that doesn't deny anyone the right to shed a tear.. whether in memory, or in heartbreak... On a different, yet somehow related note, assuming all household face the same music, every house takes a certain effort from all members... expecting one person to manage the show is not only difficult, it is unfair... Having said that, each person has their own way of pitching in, which needn't necessary the way you'd want/like it... Also, more often than not, household chores are on a higher priority for women as compared to men.. so while men seek control elsewhere,  women seek control in household issues... I am not sure who is the controller, and who is being contro...