Posts

The audition for a life partner

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The whole idea of finding the ideal partner seems to be a lopsided affair, especially in India.  Though times have changed, and thankfully the judgement is not just based on whether the girl is pretty or can cook good food, or sing well.... different things like education, job, upbringing etc are all seen.... it still feels like an audition.... And the most basic aspect is rarely questioned... that the guy comes to see the girl... as if it will be a test for the girl based on her skill set, and the judgement on the boy an be simply based on his demeanor..... I am not saying all arranged marriages (and even love marriages in some cases) are decided like this... the girl IS given the freedom to decide... But I am yet to come across a case where the boy has had to prove his mettle to the girl and her family... I wonder when that will change.....  In these changing times when men and women compete in all spheres including the corporate world, I don't know how long it will

All - Mighty

I know I have harped on this issue one too many times in the past ... but nothing seems to be enough... everyone seems to have such strong and uncompromising views on the issue, that it is difficult to explain your views.... But reading this article  in Livemint really struck a cord... The underlying essence of each and every religion is the same... believe in yourself and have faith in the Almighty (irrespective of how you address your Almighty)  and be an honest person... the rest will just follow.... However, more than half the battles in the world seem to be fought over who the true Almighty is. People tend to associate religion with identity, and hence the lack of a firm choice on the first seems to affect the other. The author Natasha Badhwar  rightly points out "Often a question about identity is spoken as if it is a judgement in itself. Sometimes a question sounds like an accusation. It is fired to prove that any answer you give will be deemed wrong. Others are

Leave and Let Live

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We keep playing around with our lives, treating our bodies like some sack that can be punched around... or more appropriately like the hit me toy, which comes back even after suffering a punch... But unfortunately, our body is neither.... its suffers each impact or neglect and non maintenance till it finally gives in... clearly, we indirectly keep inviting what we are not prepared to accept... that there is an end, and it will come soon enough.... So what happens in the end... will we rise up in smoke, or become a part of the earth once again....  What if we have an opportunity to help someone out... is it such a bad idea ? Think about it http://notto.nic.in/

Belief and Non Belief

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All of us have our notions, or imagination, about god... Almighty exists... he doesn't ...  He runs our life... we do.... He has a form... he is infinite... He lies in that corner of that room called a temple... he lies within me.... Whichever form/format one prescribes to...  Whichever belief or non - belief one lives with... It's a choice best made by one self... It would be wrong to question the others belief or instigate the other...  However, it is equally important to respect other peoples thoughts on the issue... Somehow, we find it so obvious to explain our status/ line of thought on the issue that we often try and convince other to align their thought... Whatever else might be different, but we are all human (or are atleast trying to be! )...  And that should be enough to bind us... Belief might be important, but isn't there a bigger commonality between all of us which should ideally be sufficient to co-exist...

Time - Distance - Speed ? Longing !

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Distance makes the heart grow stronger... I had heard this line so often, but I always wondered if it was true.... I mean, doesn't all the distance add up into something cynical in that small contraption being carried over shoulders by our necks... I guess we'll have to just wait and watch for the final verdict.... Keeping my fingers crossed...

Piecing it together

There is a lot of merit in piecing everything together, even if it is something as simple as a jigsaw puzzle to something life keeps throwing our way... The biggest benefit, ofcourse, is that we are working towards putting it together, towards a final goal,  an end result, which in itself results in lots of positivity.. Also, humans seem to have a tendency to play with puzzles... we like toying with the conditions to figure out what fits the situation best.... And finally, if the end result is as expected or better, the sense of achievement is incomparable.. the joy of completion with the desired outcome provides a sense of satisfaction which most daily activities are deficient of... Ultimately, a puzzle might puzzle us...  but once we solve the puzzle... we are often puzzled as to  why the puzzle puzzled us so much :)

An instant of opportunity

What would you do if you are unexpectedly given the choice of choosing you future...  or atleast a form of it... Would you jump at the opportunity, or just blank out like me... Let me explain... there were multiple thoughts running through my head just at that instance... first, and foremost, as ironic as it may sound, I wondered if I might end up underestimating myself (like duhhh !) the other one ofcourse, was wondering if life (or rather the circumstance) was playing a joke on me... Effectively, the opportunity and the option was lost... Maybe, sometime in the future, I'd wonder if I would've been better off making the choice !!!

Unfiltered Words

We are simpler and more honest people when we are younger... what is on our mind is what comes of our mouth... the blatant brutal truth...  added to that, we never bothered filtering any information with our family/loved ones. But it seems like the older we become, we put in a lot of thought into everything we do, be it a simple good morning to conversation over coffee.... cheerful banter with friends or simple things to be shared... till a point where the thinking becomes over thinking ...  The joy of sharing suddenly becomes a well thought out exercise.... thoughts to be shared are treated like burdening the other person, wondering if the would affect the person too much (or maybe not at all)... leading to muted conversations and longer silences... The urge to share thoughts is replaced by the thought of whether to burden a person... We know the issue is important, and yet we assume it isn't vital for the other to know.... Simple uncomplicated words and conversations, wh

Just Do It !!

We often have a longing in our life... for certain people, things, places.... We feel it... we absorb it... and sometimes we weep about it... But more often than not, most of us rarely do anything about it... We lead such busy lives, that the standard excuse for not fulfilling this longing is that we don't have time... but more often than not, what pulls us back is not the clock ticking by, but our will to just do it... We want to speak to our friends, but get caught up in our busy - mundane lives... and if our lives are not busy enough, we wonder if the other might be, and if we may end up disturbing them...  This tendency to over-think an action is actually the true cause... So the next time you are longing for someone, but pickup the phone/car to reach out... All the fulfillment of a wish to visit a place takes is booking of tickets... All you need is just an attitude to Just Do It !

Women = Men ?

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All of us talk about gender equality, and woman empowerment... How a girl is as good as a boy, that she can be treated like one... I've heard lots of parents saying they've raised their daughters like sons... maybe with the intent that they have been raised to be as independent and self sufficient...  But as long as we aspire for our girls to be treated like the boys... as long as the women are competing with the men... we can never be expected to be treated as equals... it feels like there is still something lacking... Women who seek to equal men lack ambition ~ Marilyn Monroe

Help while you can

There is a secret joy in helping strangers.... those walking by the street... people fumbling in a market place... or simply some pedestrian trying to cross a road.... I try not to loose such an opportunity....  But truth be told, I have a strong ulterior motive for doing this... It is always, and I mean always, with the hope that,  in case my family and loved ones are having trouble and need help, some stranger will come around and help them out... We can't help everyone, but everyone can help someone. ~ Ronald Reagan

Happy Mother's Day

From being critical about the Mother's and Father's days, to writing this today... Our life goes through different phases... from being an infant, and holding their hands... to childhood heading to adolescence, where the hand became a finger, but the touch was still essential.... somewhere in the middle of the second decade, we long for independence, striving to break free (from I wonder what !) from the "hold" our parents wield on us... I guess life comes a full circle, when we actually set out to build a nest of our own, how much we depend on them... Though I may not end up saying this to you face to face (you might even think I've actually lost it if I do ;))... but it is true... Amma, I might have grown up, but I don't think I can ever outgrow you...  You mean the world to me...  from being a child, and yet enjoying being treated as an adult by you; to now being an adult and yet your indulging my childish whims and fancies.. you just know it...

Dali

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He made paintings like Persistence of Memory ... And said things like  The only difference between a madman and myself is that I am not mad. It might sound like I am referring to a friend, but this is the most apt way to introduce anyone to the one and only Salvador Dali .  So, on his 113th birthday (and to say he still sounds relevant), I borrow his own lines.. Surrealism is destructive, but it destroys only what it considers to be shackles limiting our vision. PS: A special thanks to my friend who introduced me to the joys of Dali :) May you find more like these.

The Anthem

Though these lines were written ages ago, I am still waiting for a time when all of us truly imbibe these words, and are proud of the nation we are a part of. This is, actually, my anthem. Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high  Where knowledge is free  Where the world has not been broken up into fragments  By narrow domestic walls  Where words come out from the depth of truth  Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection  Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way  Into the dreary desert sand of dead habit  Where the mind is led forward by thee  Into ever-widening thought and action  Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake. ~ Rabindranath Tagore

Social Campaign

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After a long time, a brand has chosen a strong social message through its campaign.  Vicks in its latest advertisement  has chosen an issue which has been debated in various forums, but with no outcome. The last such socially relevant campaign was done by Tata Tea through Jaago Re , where it pushed all citizens of this country to vote. It helped that they covered the entire spectrum of issues faced by voters, from applying for a voter ids to understanding a constituency, and not just the ad campaigns. Very often, these ads leave a message which might not occur to you at the face of it, but which successfully plays on your subconscious. I hope Indians are able to churn out more such campaigns, which help Indians in becoming more and more aware.

God - I hope you hear me loud and clear !

I was suddenly reminded of an earlier post of mine when I read about the recent controversy Sonu Nigam got caught in. Loudspeakers at religious places have always been a pain, and suddenly now, media seems to have caught wind of the problem. I hope people like Babu Khan , who are fighting lone battles on the issue should be get more support from the public. Maybe that will set the right trend. As The Supreme Court rightly pronounced earlier, no religion prescribes that prayers should be performed by disturbing the peace of others nor does it preach that they should be through voice amplifiers or beating drums. Despite all the noise (literally) around this issue, The noise persists... I wonder if we can ever learn.

Word Play

We often indulge ourselves in light banter and comments, without putting much thought into the impact of those words. However, as an after thought, one would realize that each word falls into place due to a subconscious decision to say what we wanted to say. What most of us guise of slip of the tongue or unintended remarks are more often fully intended.

The Grand Plan

We are all planners.  Some of us try and plan the minutest detail and the others plan just the milestones. But whichever way we look at it, there is some amount of thought and 'inception' that goes into it. A believer would say that it is all pre-ordained and part of a grand plan... Each joy, each pain, each loss and each gain... But in that moment (of happiness or gloom) it is quite difficult to identify this plan. But if that's true, what's the point of our planning? Was it all for nothing?

Our Evolution

I know this reads like a repetition, but can't afford to under-emphasise the importance of what we pick up from our environment, subconsciously. We are all like sponges , constantly learning and unlearning from our environment. We learn at home, work, with friends, through friends and gradually, sometimes imperceptibly, change over time. But what if the changes ultimately become drastic, and one fine day, you realise you don't like parts of what you've turned into! Then is my evolution (which is supposed to be for one's better) counter productive. What do I manage my acquired aggression, talkativeness and flamboyance. I am wondering if it has become a part of me now.

Good wishes and Blessings

Some would call me selfish...   But somehow, I associate great value to the blessings we get... At the end of the day, it isn't the food we eat or the air we breathe that keeps us going, it is the good wishes and blessings we get... earn... deserve that take us through the day, and life in general. So if I see my grandmother waving her hand, I ensure it firmly lands on my head :)